When life kicks you in the behind...repeatedly

Today started out like any other day - woke up at 7AM, trudged to work half asleep, sat at my desk in a state of semi-consciousness hoping no one noticed the lack of actual work being done...etc. It also ended like almost any other day - train delays (maybe the MTA doesn't think they're being paid enough?), 25mph winds hurtling towards my unprotected face on the walk home...I could go on and on. 

Then, I picked up the mail from the mailbox before I entered the house. I am usually not the first one home, but it's sort of a routine I've developed. It makes me feel good when I see mail addressed to me, regardless of whether it's a bill, a solicitation notice, or the weekly subscription of Ok! Magazine someone seems to have signed me up for (perhaps I did it myself one day in another semi-conscious state of mind). 

Today, I get a letter from the New York Presbyterian Hospital.

Oh fudge.

A few weeks ago, I sliced my finger at work. Those of you who know the story behind it are probably still laughing at my stupidity. Those of you who don't know the story...well, let's just leave it at "I sliced my finger at work." Fire department visit, ambulance ride, and three stitches later, I have this grotesque, misplaced-skin-looking scar on my middle finger. The attending doctor at the ER told me that my dreams of becoming a hand model were over. 

Needless to say, I've been dreading receiving the bill from the hospital. Luckily, my shipment of new boots also came in the mail today. Good news, bad news? I decided to have my brother open the letter for me instead. 

"Just let me know if it's over 3 digits."

*makes unintelligible noise* "Errr.....ummm...."

Oh fudge. 

I decide to open my shipment instead. My lovely new boots, which I (sub)consciously bought to match my new gray jacket. Lo and behold, the left boot is just a shade off. Now I need to return them. After I've fallen in love.

So the score as of today:

Hospital = 1

Boots = 1

Life = 23,095

Michelle = 0

My woes are trivial compared to those of people out there who are starving, have no home, are victims of wars that are fought by men with egos. Still, I can't help thinking that someone is trying to teach me a lesson. Which begs the question: why me? 

Please deliver to the scared little girl hiding in the corner

Dear Michelle,

At this point in your life, you know who you are. Your morals and your philosophy on life have been molded by the events of the past year and you're firmly set in your ways. You've developed a set of rules to live by that others might not agree with, but are YOURS nonetheless. You don't care what others think of you (at least you try not to care) because you know that everything you're working for is ultimately for yourself. In this crazy environment you've been thrust into, you have accepted all changes and adapted seamlessly.

But what happens now? When will you realize that adapting isn't the same as moving? When will you let go of your demons and forge ahead? The clock is ticking - it's already March. Have you done any of the things that you set out to accomplish by this time of the year? What's stopping you now?

I can't always be here to provide a wake-up call. I would wish you all the luck in the world but I know you don't believe in luck. So here's to accomplishment, fulfillment and all the happiness your perseverance can acquire.

Love,
Michelle

It's the little things

There's nothing quite like

.. that first cup of coffee in the morning
.. receiving a genuine smile from a stranger
.. finding a song that makes you happy every time you hear it
.. snuggling into clean linens at the end of the day
.. discovering a misplaced letter from an old friend


.. realizing that no matter how hard life may seem at times, there's always a silver lining.